Silent Night

Silent night , silent night….

Oh shall you speak ?,

Speak with warmth and desire;

For that is all I require.

Silent night , silent night

Hold me tight,

So I can make it feel right.

Wrap me in your blanket of darkness,

Set me free,

For that is how I want to be.

Silent night, silent night

Bless upon me like a shooting star.

Resurge me,

For that is what I urge to…

Silent night, silent night

Grant me the wish of freedom,

Over my lonesome kingdom,

Greed, lust and need shall serve their deed.

Silent night, silent night ,

Oh do not go, for I shall never know what your beauty holds;

All of those stories told….

Silent night, silent night….

Oh shall you speak…?

-A.P-

One of those type of days

It’s one of those type of days,

One where I just feel like snuggling with you, so very close.

Almost makes me want to feel all your affection.

Your arms around me, keeping me warm, whilst my heat radiates into you.

It’s one of those type of days,

Holding your hand whilst I walk, no matter what the destination bd

Being around you is all that is important to me;

Oh what an amazing feeling it is.

I want to make you feel special in all ways possible.

I want to make you smile at all the small things we do together.

I want to listen to you,

I want to know you more in depth, anything and everything baby.

It’s one of those type of days,

When the sun goes down, you rest your head on my chest while I caress your hair and make you unwind from all the stress of the day.

Listen to my heart beat and sooth your soul.

I want you to feel like the very special man you are.

I want to cradle you in my arms and make you feel at ease, with no worries of the world.

You are everyones dream and right now I want to live that dream with you beside my side and share it with you.

-A.P Ora

Closing my eyes

The fear is such that none can fix,

Closing my eyes has become the most painful thought in my mind

The night skies, were once my point of admiration,

It’s was an ore,

Now it’s a close dark room.

The morning rays cradle me to sleep and the thought of my eyes closing makes my heart skip a beat and panic takes over

Fear was once a childhood boogyman,

Now it’s the norm.

My norm for each day

Closing my eyes is painful and sleep is impossible and what was once my peace is now my nightmare.

A.P.

Masquerade… My Life…

Masquerade… My life

When those eyes close one day,

Will someone wonder what was always behind the mask that I wore each day.

The mask smiles ,

I have no emotion

The mask attracts,

I hide behind it,

The mask shows no emotion,

I have all seasons running through my mind

Will someone wonder what was always behind the mask

The mask makes the world see I am just another woman,

Living each day in perfection,

A beautiful job,

Set career,

A perfect family life,

A, to the notch perfection of balance.

Will someone wonder what was always behind the mask

The mask hides all,

And no one can see the real me,

No one can even assume the worst,

As there is nothing that they can see,

If only they had my eyes…

-A.P.

Words

Words are very powerful,

If so, I think the word’ powerful is an understatement.

Words have a lot of strength in describing a state or situation one can be held in.

Words are very strong

A pinch of emotion added with a slice of reality’

Words can make or break you.

They keep coming in my mind, one after the other, playing a role in my self destruction.

One adds a few more letters to it, and it can take you on a downward spiral.

Words are very much a strong weapon,

It can cause mass issues’

Words don’t leave my thought and mind,

Day in and day out, words play games.

Oh how very much I try to not think,

My memory is clouded.

Words take me to a world of glamour, and than detours to a life of self pity,

Oh how very much I try to not think.

Words can cause fear, harm, and pile up to the cause of another world war.

Words are very strong

A.P.

MIRRORS # 2

MIRRORS

It’s very surreal,

Reality is not So beautiful ,

Surrealism is the best description.

A smile on the face, is all good and flash.

When someone looks in the mirror , than they see all they are told …..

You are an ugly personally,

You are a lier , and you ate everything else that’s why you don’t deserve anything good.

Insecurity is a very damaging aspect in ones life.

Yes you are insecure but please don’t blame me

The surreal life seems to be so much better,

Sometimes it feels that the face I sight, Is really ugly and not worth anything , yet I try to still smile from my heart to possibly exit Any negative thoughts.

The mirror still doesn’t lie to me

It tells me to ask what you really are deep down inside.

Is your image just an Illusion ?

Look carefully at the mirrored image , and you Will see as honest person that has a clean heart.

But again she is just human

A.P.

World War 1 or was it …

Gunshots so loud it still echos in my reincarnated life,

Each night I see the shots being fired lighting up the night skyline, just like the fireworks do now for the New Year’s Eve.

It’s that very image I jump awake to each night, the silence still echos, screams , machine guns ….

There are many dug out dungeons.

My hair so sleek pinned back in a perfect bun,

The dress pressed to perfection, the collar and cuffs as white as snow,

The choice of material was serge, and held the colour of the sky; blue.

Kerchief wrapped around the head to give the final touch.

I was dressed to precision.

Along side where my helpers , one screamed “Maitron! , I can’t keep this one going”.

The odour of boric acid and sodium hypochlorite so potent till this day, it reminds me of than.

“Let’s just sedate with chloroform!”, I yelled, in hope to keep him going and rest at a lower heart rate.

Blood oozing from many wounds , my sterile apron obviously not sterile anymore.

The camp fire lit very dim, to not attach too much attention.

The opposition are moving in closer each day,

All men sleep deprived and many malnutritioned despite all the volunteers serving the best in such a situation.

My dress tethered, the rain has washed all the blood off my open wound.

I’m breathing so heavily I can almost count each heartbeat in my mind.

I feel the lack of oxygen and I’m clearly hyperventilating.

Will I be able to get back to camp site ?

Who are these men ?

What do they want ?

Do I know something that will caused destruction ?

At the camp I find causality number 112.

After the chloroform had done its job, I sterilised my scalpel on a burning fire,

Cutting away the tissue around the 2 wounds, now hopefully the debridement will keep infection away.

Done !, methylated sprite than soaked the would , causing the casualty nil pain, thank goodness!

I than bring together my sharp tools to seal up the wound.

TBC

A.P.